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"In the '70s, there was the playing loose around the edges idea," she says."Poly is trying to come across as thoughtful and considerate." An obvious benefit, Weston says, is that sexual monotony seldom sets in.Before the road trip, Cherie had three boyfriends at once.
Handling the "fear response" in partners can be an issue, says Chris.Franklin Veaux, an ex-partner of Cherie, says he, too, is hardwired to be a polyamorist."Why does the princess or the prince who lives in a castle have to choose? "There is enough room for everyone." He keeps in touch with Cherie through instant messaging, although they are not romantically linked right now.Another term to describe one type of open relationship is polyamory -- literally, "multiple loves." Those who practice open relationships or polyamory often say they are "hardwired" this way and that laying the ground rules for multiple relationships spares everyone hurt and disappointment.Not everyone agrees, with some therapists calling the polyamorous model a recipe for hurt, disappointment, jealousy, and breakups."Everybody adds value to my life." Those who pursue an "open" or polyamorous relationship are obviously not conventional types, says William Doherty, Ph D, director of the marriage and family therapy program at the University of Minnesota, St. "There are always some people who want to push the limits of their experiences -- their joy, their ecstasy in life," he says. Those who pursue multiple relationships simultaneously, Doherty says, say they are capable of many loves and passion and that "artificial cultural constraints" tell them they should restrict their love and passion to just one person.