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One male director of a design firm told the paraphrased, “it has been figured out how men and women should interact.” But the rules of interaction haven’t changed—it’s just that, for the first time, women are publicly calling foul en masse.

Sexual harassment has moved from the realm of cheesy office training videos to the real world, where harassers are not only Donald Trumps and anonymous subway masturbators, but also our friends, lovers, fathers, and work buddies.

Actions that once seemed playful or relatively harmless now seem sinister, invisible grease for the wheels of an orchestrated system of humiliation designed to instill self-doubt and fear into women who might have otherwise posed a threat to male control.

“What happened to me was something that was so casual, I almost didn’t even consider it sexual harassment, even though it was beyond my desire,” wrote the Of course, not every uncomfortable experience is harassment, and not every woman is redefining these experiences as abuse.

Male friends have contacted me out of the blue to ask me to be honest, to tell them if I think they’ve ever done anything to earn them a spot on one of the many semi-secret lists of sexists and creeps bouncing around the internet.

When I told a Lyft driver in Detroit that I was in town for the Women’s Convention in late October, he asked if I was “a #Me Too,” too.

Now, we must contend with the knowledge that the everyday woman, by virtue of existing in the public sphere, has endured untold violations.

A friend’s father, who I’ve known for years and hugged at least a dozen times, paused and asked for consent before putting an arm around me at a party this month.

“It’s just—you never know how people will feel about being touched these days,” he said with a laugh.

By legal definition, sexual harassment is unwelcome or unwanted; if it’s welcome or wanted, it’s not harassment.

The baked-in subjectivity of this definition, combined with the large-scale recalibration of this moment, has allowed space for some people to wonder whether cracking down on sexual harassment will put an end to all friendly flirtation.

The agency also has offices in Malaysia, Hongkong, Indonesia and Thailand, and we have been featured more than 600 times in the media.

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