Dating guy getting divorced
Some may be offended, but you needn’t attract the whole world, just one (literally) single match. He could be lying or unclear about his intentions to divorce; you could be wife-bait; the divorce could drag on for years. Starting a relationship during a divorce, when you both have kids and you don’t know the risks/circumstances, is just (warning, technical term coming) cra-cra.
Think about how Stressful your own divorce was; now imagine yourself in *someone else’s*, where you have even less control and high odds you won’t be Priority #1: “….having to “be there” for anyone else only made my problems seem worse, and made it a lot harder for me to function just day to day.
And evolutionarily speaking, women might accurately feel they are running out of time; with every decade past men’s 20s, guys who can snag ever-younger partners do, leaving straight women of their own cohort short of available mates: “….[My now-ex] said I had no right to date because we were ‘still married’, ha!
You have to have the time and energy (and inclination) to work at a relationship. If you were madly in love, knew his circumstances better and felt good about them, the divorce was definitely finalizing soon, and somehow you’d found ways to mitigate the Stress, then I might advise you differently.Do I need to see finalized legal papers before I can meet someone for coffee? So imagine you’re lonely in a marriage—and then you find out that because of a vast array of legal, financial, parenting, and partner issues, the divorce itself is going to take years: “[There’s a] mandatory 2-year separation period in our state….Dan Dear Duana, I’m a single mom, and I’ve been set up with another single parent who is ‘not quite divorced’. Should I suggest he contact me when the divorce is final? He got an apartment, and still came ‘home’ after work for months to help put our two young children to bed as neither of us emotionally was ready to tell the kids.So he stayed ‘married’ to me until I [could support myself]….That’s a long time to be legally married to someone that has clearly moved on (he moved in with his girlfriend after about a year).Should I have one coffee date and see what I think? Eventually, we told them, and about 2 years later our divorce was final…..[He also] knew that it would take me time to re-enter the workforce after having been a stay at home mom to our children, and that after we were divorced I would have no health insurance…