Dating fear being hurt
In fact, being chosen by someone we truly care for and experiencing their loving feelings can often arouse deep-seated fears of intimacy and make it difficult to maintain a close relationship.
It may be surprising to learn that the real resistance to intimacy often doesn’t come from the acts of our partners, but from a lurking enemy within us.
We don’t intentionally reject love to preserve a familiar identity.
Instead, during times of closeness and intimacy, we react with behaviors that create tension in the relationship and push our loved one away.
The experience of real love often threatens our self-defenses and raises our anxiety as we become vulnerable and open ourselves up to another person. Falling in love not only brings excitement and fulfillment; it also creates anxiety and fears of rejection and potential loss.
For this reason many people shy away from loving relationships. As kids, when we experience rejection and/or emotional pain, we often shut down.
We can overcome our fears of intimacy and enjoy more loving and more intimate relationships.
Fear of intimacy is an often subconscious fear of closeness that frequently affects people’s personal relationships.
This fear of physical and/or emotional intimacy tends to show up in people’s closest and most meaningful relationships.
Here are some common ways people distance themselves emotionally as a result of a fear of intimacy: In order to overcome our fear of intimacy, we must challenge our negative attitudes toward ourselves and not push our loved ones away.
It is possible to challenge our core resistance to love.Carla's Story Jay's Story Lash's Story Hidden Talents Daisy' Story Zena's Story Useful Books on Domestic Violence and Children available from the UK: Why Does He Do That?